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Re: Equilibrium - good way to put it.From: Rainbowbear
Subject: General
Date/Time 2005-08-03 15:59:36
Remote IP: 198.161.230.10
MessageHOnestly, I find it hard to have a regular diet. For months I will eat one way and then for months I will eat another.
I will give you the low down.
I have tried a high protein diet. To tell you the truth after about 3 days I want to puke it all up. However my iron levels get a little low and I need a little meat. For a couple months it would've been maybe a small piece of chicken in the a.m., salad at noon, maybe with some salmon or tuna or chicken. Then for supper some more meat. I will do this for awhile, maybe lose 10 lbs and then I will get a carb craving and go buy a half dozen donuts.
I have tried just eating a little of everything but that is almost impossible just because once I get a whiff of carbs everything goes out the window.
My best way of eating should be:
1-2 TBSP of coconut oil per day (to control yeast that I have in body due to imbalance from fasting on lemon cleanse for 40 days)
1 multivitamin
1-2 vitamin C
2 odourless garlic pills
1 Glucosomine and Chrondotin
No early breakfast, however maybe about 10 a.m. a small piece of chicken.
Lunch - a huge salad of greens and a few veggies with a little salad dressing.
Supper - 1/4 cup of brown rice/veggies (not too many carrots, no corn (can't eat it - doctors say my system doesn't like it too much), not too many peas either.
Evening snack 1 piece of fruit
Lots of water
1 small coffee during day probably in a.m.
Things I cannot have because of allergies
eggs - stomach feels like hot coals are in it
peanuts - circulation is not good, legs swell, feel yecchy
milk and cheese - hold weight, puffiness
no aspartame and really sucrolose is not much better for me but I sometimes cheat and have sucrolose diet pops
no breads, no wheat breads for sure
no gluten
no wine, I have reflux from a bacteria (I grew up, up north lots of flies and bacteria from flies on food ruined my esophagus a bit so I have to be careful)
no liquor - with the qigong it wings me out too much. Usually takes me 3 days to balance back. Definately not worth it.
NO SUGAR!!
So you see I know what I should be doing, just that I can't seem to get my poop together to do it. Working on that though. THis time I truly do not want to fail. Definately getting sick of it.
Oh - I was doing 40 minutes of pilates 6 days a week for over a month, went hiking in the mountains for a few days and went to a 2 hour taiji class twice per week and hit the gym about 3 itmes in a week. Do 30 minutes of cross trainer and about 35 minutes of weights and stretching, abs, etc. Then well, the taiji went down the tubes because I let them milk me for $$ for uniforms and now couldn't afford to pay for the next month. Great strategy. Holiday is over, work is heavy, physical fitness is down agian quite a bit. Taught qigong class at my house for 1.5 hours last night. Mostly neigong.
What I should be doing is 30 minutes neigong per day along iwth 30 minutes of taiji. Hit the gym 3 times per week. Pilates 2 times per week. Lots of walking. And well, I want to do some amazing htings with my sword some day so I would like to up my training a bit. HOpefully time will allow for that soon.
Right now I eat too much. I truly do. AFter I lost the 50 lbs I totally sabotaged myself. I ate lots, more than lots to gain the weight back. Why? Punishment. Not good enough. This is truth of expereince. Do you know what my taiji master said to me as we argued the last night I was there, the taiji master who taught me my sword, the taiji master for whom I taught his classes for, at the university and the community for 5 years. He tried to make me disciple, energy transmission but i didn't know, I was too busy trying to send energy to heal my friend who had cancer when we were doing qiogng form. I could feel his energy come at me. I guess I knotted it all up above my pink compassion cloud. Boy was he pissed. Know what my total idol said to me after my friend and her husband left the studio. He said I wasn't supposed to say those things. What things. Wouldn't tell me. Then he said to me(after repeasted banterings of what things?) he said that my taiji wasn't the worse he had ever seen but it was close. For frigg sake I taught the person who teaches the Hunyuan system for him now the qigong and form. For frigg sake I taught for him outside the school. I was taught the whole Hunyuan broadsword form in 3 hours, when he asked me to show the class they thought I had done it for years. This master pretty much crushed me. I cried and told him I only wanted to every learn taiji. I could tell you stories that would make your hair curl. And you know if you look on his site you won't see me there, no name, no nothing yet for 6 years I was in his school. I had enough though when he dealt me that last blow. I was innocent in helping my friend and he wanted me to say nothing, nothing, nothing. Who did he htink I was a man? Geeezzz! So you see this is one of the reasons, rejection ... incompletion ... failure. YOu think weighgain is simple, think weight loss is simple. Is not. Stress in itself willkeep you fat.
I can not eat. I did it for 40 days and worked 5 days a week at my regular job. I had only distilled water, fresh lemon juice from freshly squeezed lemons, maple syrup. That is it. Nothing else. I did it at Easter. I did it because the universe said I needed to detoxify. I had black stuff come out from my insides, a black discharge. So yes, it did work for that. But once it was over, hell I gained the weight back because I had not dealt with any of the underlying issues of my weight.
Before I did notknow I should not eat cheese or peanuts or breads or pastas. So no matter how hard I trained I just could not lose the weight. Now my system is unbalanced because of the acidity I put my body thru duringmy fast and the yeast the has taken up residence. Difficult. And I should not eat too much protein either. Is hard on kidneys.
I have great stamina and have been informed I do not need much food. Very little actually. Just nutrients and a little bit of protein for organ health . I do not like too much meat but I need iron, eggs are out, cheese is out. Nuts are out. So go figure.
Well that is about it.
I find this to be a good universe joke. Along iwth the taiji thing. Master who taught me most fuc_s me up hte most. My choice of course. Hard when one is sensitive, emotional and woman to let go of that experience, espeically when that expeirence holds your passion - taiji/qigong/sword. Hard.
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